i'm begining to realise that i'm very dependent on people. i need interaction. i need to express my happiness or sorrow through a conversation. i need to be around people with whom i can say just about anything to. i guess that's one of the reason why i become so moody when studying. but it's hard to find a friend who shares the same needs these days. i've been wondering what i'm going to do this holidays when most of my friends are still working and won't have the time for idling. haha i'd hate to think that i'll still be spending my days cooped up at home staring at my computer screen. if that were the case, then i'd much rather be going for lessons.
anyway now's not the time to think about that. haha. 13 more hours and i can do it for as long as i want. haha. onward. oh yes and red shirt for me tomorrow... haha!
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7 more hours till the start.
anyway i just love this ad. i think it's simple intriguing and not overly outrageous. haha. simplicity.
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so good luck to me and all those having examinations. haha.
oh yes i feel like being even more pantang and wearing red for examination. haha. probably grad alg. haha then i can blame yet another thing other than my riddiculously short hair now. haha.
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i found out some things during the course of our conversation. haha for instance, i never knew (or recalled) that she was the valedictorian for kindergarden!!! haha i mean how cool is that? haha being a valedictorian before even knowing what the word meant! haha.
chatted with my sis till 2 am. and had a game of cribbage with her. haha. i won! first time in a long long time. :)
haha. 2 more days to the examinations. i'm more or less ready for group. somehow lang manages to put me at ease every time i see him. haha as good teachers always do. going to prepare for matix comp today and grad algebra tomorrow. haha.
haha. Bill Withers' "It's gonna be a lovely day" is play on my wmp now. haha waht a nice song to start the day with (even though it's a bit ancient). so i wish you all... a lovely day!
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anyway. haha. i've decided. i shall cut my hair on saturday morning. that way, if i don't do well for my exams, i can blame it on superstition! haha!
i wore this shirt to school today and everyone commented that i did not look like myself. haha. do i really look like a walking advertisement for adidas nowadays? haha anyway my sister bought this shirt for me. I have to say i like it quite a bit. haha.
curious georgehaha i spend about 4 hours in the lab with lang and en today. we were going through some of the questions form herstein. haha. lang's really a dedicated teacher. he stayed back till 9 today. and even came over just before he left to ask me if i had any other questions and to tell me he was going. haha. my ou xiang! haha next sem when i teach i will be like that!!!! haha!
today i was feeling all happy and good because i recieved yet another email from my student expressing his thanks. it feels really good to be appreciated. haha. i know i havent done all that i could have done this semester for them and part of me feel like i've let them down. so it's always good to have someone affirm your worth. haha.
today limin dropped by because she went to the optician at nus co-op. so i had a little chat with her. haha. hoinam dropped by as well. and boy. that certainly reminded me of the good old year 1 days. so relaxed and carefree. munching on a doughnut. skipping classes. sitting around chatting. not even panicing before the exam because i knew i would somehow make it. haha. and then i thought to myself. what's "wrong" with me now?
i think perhaps now, i'm surrounded by people who are high achievers. people who consistantly get As. People who come from illustrious universities. i guess the pressure is on me to match up. and sometimes i lose sight of the fact that i'm not them. haha. i'm just me. plain old me. so why should i live up to other people's standards?
i think i will go into the next few days with this attitude in mind. i've already done what i could for this semester. what will be is now out of my hands. it's not giving up, it's accepting fate and not being miserable because i'm predicting my own doom. for sure i will continue to press on, but certainly with a different mindset. one not about trying to be as good as everyone else, but rather one that says that i will simply try to be the best that i can be. haha.
i somehow figured that out while talking to herk. thx brudder.
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haha. sometimes when i sit in the lab doing my work. i wonder how in the past i could have been so carefree about exams when i knew close to nothing. somehow i guess i always had the faith in myself that i could pull through. somehow. but now, i cant seem to find it anymore.
anyway, someone once told me it's not that we are incapable of achieving what we dream of, but rather, we're to afraid to even take the first step. initiation. that's always the problem. this mental inertia is what stops us from doing the things we know we want to do. of course, to any bystander, this seems riddiculously stupid. but i'm willing to bet my last penny, that there is something right now that you know you probably want to do but are just to afraid to try it. and with that attitude, dreams will remain what they are... dreams.
haha my mum was mentioning... again... that she is considering selling the house. part of me thinks i shldt interfere. but part of me doesnt want this sale to go thru. well at least until i get an apartment of my own. but for that to happen, i need to earn $$. and when will that actually happen? 1.5 years from now. what a long wait. haha my mum was joking abt the fact that if i move out, my sis will probably follow me and i'll have to deal with her mess! (yes if you think i'm messy enough, wait till u see her!!) hahaha.
anyway here's an "inspirational pic". the will to win! neither blood, sweat nor pain will stand in my way.
han ki hoon 한기훈oh no. i just read thru and realise that i'm not making much sense. clear indicator of how much herstein and hungerford i'm been doing. sigh. time for meji milk to put me to sleep (i just realised how nice it feels to drink milk before sleeping yes after brushing teeth.) i dun like the taste in my mouth after brushing.
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The officials never stop the game and ask that guy to wipe off the blood ah? I know badminton isn't a contact sport but still. =x
don't be grumpy!
*slaps*
wooby
By 
, at
11:43 PM
haha apparently it was quite drama. he had off court treatment. played halfway. felt that the bandage was impeeding him. so he ripped it off and continued. he stopped after every point to wipe blood. haha. i admire him. SO MOTIVATED!! and only 18!!
By 
20 sec interval... fire!!, at
11:51 PM
aiyah no lah. he ripped it off so that he HAD to wipe off the blood every point. This means MORE TIME TO REST!
wooby san
By , at
12:40 AM
had a short break from studying today. started the day with a consultation session. and boy was it busy. i think i more or less was talking non stop from 9am to 1 pm? it was so busy today and aside from me wl and cyc there was still bertrand and even wm popped by later. and yet we couldnt even finish on time.
as a result we had to give au petit salut a miss (dang... i've been wanting to eat there since god knows when). haha anyway we celebrated wm's belated bdae at NYDC. the pic speaks for itself.
haha. then it was back to mugging again. sigh.
anyway as i was going to school today, i heard a mother say to her daughter "you're very smart but just sooooo lazy!" and i wondered what effect that would have on the child. obviously the intention of the mother, i guess, is to spur her daughter on and motivate her to work harder. but i just couldnt help feeling that this semi praise semi criticism would have the opposite effect. somehow i think that the child, who is already lazy (which is why the parent even made the comment in the first place i guess...) , would probably think "hey at least i'm smart, so i can get by even though i do less work and since i'm not aiming to be the next astronaut into space, i might as well take it easy." or then again it might be just my weird neurotic way of thinking again. haha!
anyway i'm going go dream of solutions to hungerford in la la land now. haha. ganbatte to me! and to all of course.
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sigh... i'm can just tell i'm gonna be pretty cranky this week. after like just 7 hours of studying in school today i could have probably flared up at possibly the slightest of things. haha. luckily people stayed clear of me. haha!
waiting for hair to dry. which shouldnt be long since i have short hair. i walked home today. from school. cos i missed 151. i found it to be very refreshing. especially when you're stressed. you know the sony ericsson advert that has the part that says i (love) missing the last bus home. haha well i kinda did today. just walk and listen to ur mp3 player. not thing about anything except the lyrics. haha. it had somewhat of a calming effect on me. haha. i think maybe i need to do this more this coming week. which is good for 2 things. 1) it makes me less grumpy 2) i can study more cos i am not limited by bus schedules. haha!
finally confirm the trip to phuket in december. looking forward to it. i need to get out for a while. just do nothing. i wanna do nothing!!
today was pretty productive. i've done about half of my workload of herstein questions already. one more day and i should be ready for discussion on monday. haha. sad life. nitez!
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had a very, well, i wouldnt say scary, incident last tuesday. the last day of badminton in NUS this year, because after that they close for exams and renovations. haha, after playing the last match against the profs, i partnered someone else to play against another group of people because alex felt a bit dizzy. while playing halfway i felt my calves starting to cramp. u know the feel where it tightens and the releases for no reason. some kind of spasm perhaps? medicine pple care to enlighten me? haha. anyway, i was really asking for it when i continued to push on, so a few points later, as i was making an incredible jump backwards to smash the shot, they both cramped up at the same time. while in mid air. so basically i couldnt land on my feet and just crashed to the ground. thankfully, the cramp happened when i pushed off the ground so i didnt get much height anyway. so it was a rather soft, but nevertheless embaressing, collapse to the ground. haha
it's only the second time i've had calf cramps. the first being after a race in the army. but this one seems alot worse. my right calf is still hurting after 2 days although the pain is noticably lesser.
haha.
ok back to work! jiayou jiayou!
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In the army when I have calf cramps, I often wake up in the middle of the night when the cramps re-activate again. -_- This happens even after when I do post stretching. =(
I use yoko-yoko!
oogaooga
By , at
11:25 AM
boy am i looking forward to the end of the exams already. only 3 papers this time round. for group theory, i need to complete herstein by this week, for matrix computation, i need to spend probably about 2 days studying because i dont intend to aim for an A for this module. no point putting in so much effort for something i dont really like. haha. then hopefully the next week for grad algebra. that's the plan, the route of advancement for me, at least for now. haha.
life's been quite good to me lately. i've been feeling pretty upbeat and ready to tackle anything.
i think sometimes i blog like a 14 year old. haha. but i cant do anything else because i havent been reading or watching the news. gosh, i dont even know what's going on in my own backyard. it's embarressing at times, yes it is.
on the plus side, korea won the world junior championship team title along with the bs, bd and xd titles. henin hardenne is in the finals for the year end championships against mauresmo and regardless of the result will finish the year as number 1. nalbandian sadly just lost to federer in the first round robin match in shanghai. haha. so that's the news i've been keeping up with.
this week will be the final week i'll be tutoring. well at least for this sem. haha. it's been a really fruitful experience. haha. i think or i hope atleast my third class has benefited to some extend from my tutorials. haha. i'm sorry to my first class though. it always happens, even to experienced tutors. the first class is always the worst because you go in not really knowing what to expect. and its only since ast week that after sitting in for wu liang's and cyc's tutorial classes that i realise that that should have been how i prepared for all my classes.
korean 1 has ended. will be going out with the teacher this friday for dinner. haha class gathering. not bad ah. my class is quite onz. haha
oh ya. hexiang showed me this neat trick to impress sec 1 or 2 kids next time when i'm a math teacher. but hopefully i wun have to use it because i'm praying i'll go to at least a jc. haha.
i had so many thing i wanted to write about this week. but i did not do it when i had the chance. sigh. now i've forgotten them all. must make it a point to write when i can. haha.
oh well. i'm craving for some rum and raisin ice cream. haha. looks like i'm going to make a trip down to 7-11 to get some. haha i'm such a pig sometimes. my mum thinks i'm perpetually pregnant cos i keep getting food cravings. haha.
anywayz. to those preparing for exams, which by now must certainly be the minority of people, good luck. to those working, have a good week! to those holidaying! hang on! it'll be 2 more weeks before i join you!! haha.
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