Thursday, April 13, 2006
i cannot believe it. only 1 more paper to go before i finish my undergraduate days. and this time without any uncertaintity. just had my japanese oral test yesterday. it was perhaps the most stressful test i've ever taken because of the quantity of infomation that you are required to remember. english oral exams were always fun for me. i looked forward to every single practise session and even the exams because i just love speaking in a formal context. mandarin oral exams were not exactly my cup of tea, but you know, after having grown up in an enviroment where you really do hear it on television 50% of the time, it doesnt become that daunting. french oral exams lie somewhere in between these 2. whilst getting all nervous knowing my mastery of the language (or rather lack thereof), i guess it was also fun to go for the exams because it allowed you freedom of expression based on what you can remember and what you would like to say. japanese on the other hand, required that i memorise some 1000 plus words in addition to studying the grammar. and the scary part is that we all knew that these mere 1000 words would be all that we needed to ace the exams!
i guess some people might be wondering if this makes any sense at all. i mean throughout of schooling lives, we've always hounded teachers for hints for coming tests or seeking their aid in 'spotting' question for exams. we prefer to know what will come out and what will definately not come out. we like being told where we can play and the places that are out of bounce. we prefer the certainty of being enclosed within a definite sphere of certaintity rather than let loose upon a plane of uncertainty. so why would i find french oral tests so much less stressful than japanese tests when the oral exams for french do not really have a fixed boundary?
i guess the only real convincing answer i can provide, is that with a fixed boundary, you KNOW that the treasure is burried within that certain area. you and everyone else looking for it KNOWS that there are only a limited number of possibilities for its location. as so, with our highly competitive instincts, we (or at least i) become more flustered in our search, knowing that every unsuccessful attempt could very well spell defeat. that's how i see japanese. everyone knows what to do for the exam and you need to be able to perfect that well enough in order to stand out amongst the rest. this certainly adds to mounting pressure on already heavy backs. french on the other hand, is akin to searching of the X over a vast unrestricted plane. the oral exams are very much limited to how much you know and what you can remember. so in that sense, i guess the fatalist in me helps to relive the pressure exerted upon by my natural competitiveness.
i guess that's why i usually enjoy preparing for exams like GP.
okay. enough about that. the results of the nus master programme should be released soon. i'm quite certain i will get in. the only issue now is if i will get the scholarship as well. but well, it's not the end of the world if i don't. and as tkm sez, he'd rather i concentrate on doing the masters than fufilling all the extra duties that are tied to recieving the award.
oh yes, i was watching "beyond tomorrow" on tv yesterday. i think it's an updated version of "beyond 2000" which is this scientific informative documentary show which i loved ever since i was a little boy. it was perhaps the first show that inspired me to want to do anything related to presenting on television. as most of you would have known, becoming a journatist was perhaps my greatest ambition probably on par with becoming a teacher. i always loved delivering speeches or presentations. i loved the how soothing articulate english sounded and was amazed at how it could really arouse attention. to me, speaking well was almost akin to dressing well. it potrayed an image of sophitication and intelligence, qualities that i've always wanted to possess. but alas, i now spend most of my day speaking without proper grammar and with relaxed pronunciation and intonation. i've lost all my "th"s, my "d"s and "t"s and what not. only when i get to present anything formally do i really make an effort to rectify all these hideous mistakes. but i guess it really isnt necessary to speak well all the time. the main reason for language to to communicate and if one can communicate with other without speaking well in the traditional sense, then i say it's okay. but ah, i wonder what the would would be like to have eveyone speaking their languages well. and in case your wondering, i'm not trying to be bigoted nor am i in any way trying to be condecending. just something i though about when thinking about what could have been.
{11:19 AM}
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